please

i'm really not allowed on the computer at this point, but i just wanted to let people know that i still care about this site and that it will always be my home and venting place.

im scared of the future. im scared of the next few hours. im scared of the sirens i hear even though they arent for me. im scared of the sirens that i constantly imagine. im scared that i will lose myself and my identity. im scared that i wont be free.
but im not scared of losing the friends that have been with me here. i know in my heart that i will always have them and that they will always have me.

please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. im struggling to feel that love and sense of meaning right now. please pray for me. pray that everything will be okay. pray that i can make it.
i really want to.


please take care. God bless you.